Plandemics

If it wasn’t so obvious it would be written in BOLD RED  type infront of you..I am wondering, perhaps on a deeper front, we need to all take stock. I wonder, I just wonder, why we have not got the kind of moral naturally good leaders who would stand by any man or woman and be on their side, just right now, where have all the good people gone? We need good moral leaders there is no excuse for what we have all witnessed. WEF…is that it? Money is not God. I feel there is something Babylonian in the biblical sense.. going on… Babylon the Great… is meant to be one humungous demonic force.. it is in the bible.. it says we are all going to be doing business with this thing… but, identifying what is the good and evil in business forums.. I do hope someone holy stands up at the WEF meeting and does something to stop the slip into this dark hole they are building. You know that expression the rat race… well we are humans and not rats.. do not let any leader anywhere try to decern anything different. God made man, (and woman)…God made us we are a wonderful thing. But, we are not going in the right direction, it is obvious people have taken advantage during this ‘trying’ time, but, still there is no real investigation as to the Corona virus 19 origins. Why are the business people trying to make it difficult to travel abroad? That is the most curious thing, and also very disappointing. I cannot think of a single young person who has not yearned to travel and explore the world, but, what has happened just lately, seems to have put one hell of a plank or obstruction in the way of the feet of the many. We can all stop this now by petitioning our governments making them more accountable. Governments are meant to serve the people. I would like to hope a child born today would have the same freedoms to study and travel, as my expectations have been in the past, without anything affecting their health in the long term. Nature is not the force producing deadly ‘new’ viruses. The cost of medicine, is down to the manufacturers, but no one should make it impossible to receive medications that are deemed important to life. I am someone who believes in eating good things too, that can also aid health. I just wonder why the malicious element of distruction is being focused on by the likes of people like Bill Gates? He could not be richer than he is today but, decided to tell the WEF about the economics of medications. God bless us with better thinkers than that man. Perhaps he will go and live on his own little island somewhere and stop bothering the human race.

There was a time when communities existed that helped eachother. There is a wonderful book called Lark Rise to Candleford by Flora Thompson. People farmed the land and I guess there was more exchange by barter then. But, look at that whole way of life. People had not forgotten what wonderful things exist in nature, and farming puts a person in touch with the land. When you look at the whole event of Economic Forums.. they are not about the people in community, they are about people who have wealth, and quite possibly no moral fibre it would seem. Someone commented about the amazing number of private jets used in order that the super rich could meet. I hope they do not forget how God cares for each one of us. If God can count the hairs on your head.

It is said that pollution can have an affect on health. In Southampton some years ago, there was research into the reason people became asthmatic, where they had had no childhood illness of this sort. The reason for the research was the increase in asthma cases in later adult life.  Pollution it is said, breaks down even the membrane tissues in the nose, so there is more likelyhood of allergens and reactions within the body. The natural body’s defence, is weakened by pollution. Well, we all know the outcome of heavy smoking is the possible development later in life of emphyzema. In the course of doing social care work, I have witnessed some of these ailments in the most bright people. If something is toxic to the human body, it should be avoided. And yet, look at us the human race, quite prepared to be devilish, and poison ourselves! I have to follow my own instincts these days, but, God is a guide when you are ever in doubt.

There does need to be more education available on the benefits of certain foods. I love it whenever a publication is made showing how beneficial certain foodstuffs can be especially with regard to human ailments that are common. But, mainly, I am writing this today because we have to help eachother.

To be continued…

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Just Being

Today marked a new start, and I had not expected it. Great to think, I will focus on the writing finally and exhibitions of my visual efforts.. called ART.

Back to the bucolic of countryside walks, and totally without any control, my summer took on a strange activity of walks between the last stop where a bus would take me near to my workplace and the fact that most country roads are without pavements. Machines can accelerate, and cars pass like huge bullets. I have just my own sense of the size of such a possibility of if an accident should occur. I have seen two forms of roadkill in the last week or so. One a butterfly, the other a young red squirrel. All smashed or squashed by the vehicles which transport us the humans to our ‘destination’. There is no time machine, to reverse the ‘accident’. The little squirrel had met its fate, and so had the tortoiseshell butterfly. But, the latter even after dying, still displayed such wonderful yellows, and markings, and the wings of which translate as something of a marvel. Perhaps I do envy a little the speed of the big silver metallic machines we call cars to get around, but, the walks show me something more.

There are ‘amplifiers’ and ‘amplifiers’, some of which extend the sound range of a piece of live music, and some which, simply enlarge what we wish to view with more clarity, like a microscope or camera lens. I found myself soaking up the atmosphere of blue sky and sunshine today. It is a privilege and a wonder, just to see miles of fields of grass or hay. At this time bales of hay are dotted around, the yellow dryness of straw everywhere.

It is said England has reached a peak temperature of 33 degrees celsius, this weekend alone. The air is somehow hard to breathe, but, perhaps that is just heat and the effect on a human body. At my workplace one of our guests lost a cute scotty dog, a little white dog expired in this heat. Unusual and sad, and horrid, to lose the pet you brought on holiday to heat. Human life is a fragile thing too.

How fast how slow are we supposed to be, in our age? No matter how they try to slow traffic along country lanes people disobey the rule. The large lettering in the road, is redundant to the task, if a car is going faster than it should, the words are not going to be read. They are words that are ignored. The words say in large, long letters SLOW.

Time is sometimes, something of a strange event. The moon has cycles, the Earth follows too, something of a relationship like a good clock, that keeps Mr Time, at his work. I lean on everything I have known, and everything that is spontaneously to hand to deliver a message. I guess it is the tortoise and the hare type. Slow, slow, quick, quick slow.

The butterfly wings flap at a fast rate to keep the little creature in the air. Its body its thorax being the thickest part of its shape, but, still light weight, and still, there is not much to it. The wings are huge in comparison, but, very thin, and veined, and magnificent. The fluttering is rapid, nonstop, pretty, and it alights on a leaf, momentarily. The little creature is observing even me through ommatidia and has tiny thin antena. They are like a fly, with many images receiving the information about my huge beaming face perhaps. 12,000 images of me?

And observing as I do, the stroll, down a country lane has transformed my whole day. There are just miles and miles of fields. When I got to the bus stop, there was a bug on my hand luggage, I had thought to photograph it with my phone, but it vanished as quickly as it alighted, it had bright orange legs and mandibles, and almost irredescence of some sort of blackish blue coloration on its body. Small, tiny less than two centimetres, he the less observed creature who most people will not have the privilege of seeing, suddenly he is a star performer in my day, Mr Pimpla rufipes, like a Jimmy cricket.

Social Media The Madness

Censorship is happening at a frightening pace. I have finally realised, that Twitter for example is behaving unprofessionally, particularly over the recent attempt of a ‘takeover’. It doesn’t take too much to realise that if you are not allowed to debate things in the news, that free speech is actually being deminished by an invisible hand. I am not going to be party to that. I mentioned debatable issues to do with the Covid vaccine, and got told by Twitter to delete the tweet. I don’t agree with them, and punishing my account by a six day silence is to me, heinous and a crime against my personal liberty. I think, it is impossible for the American culture to stay true to its name of Independence if it doesn’t keep its constitution in place for the next few hundred years. I am horrified, that the places of debate are decreasing if not becoming extinct like the precious animals of our Earth’s history. Maybe it is us too who will become extinct?

I believe if the freedom seekers find this blog, they’ll follow me for what I am and not what I am not. God Bless everyone in this endeavour.

Please read all my books… they’re only cheep and I sell them currently through Amazon kdp.

Journey Home; Enlightened Heart tell you what I consider important. I believe thoroughly in debating the modern times we are living through because cursedly, we are victims of extremists currently in government. They try to say they are not extreme but the amount of clamp down is showing too boldly. Perhaps its the pharmaceutical companies who signed up to make untested vaccines. Who knows. I object to being made a guinea pig for any of them. I believe in health and mostly in eating good quality food to make sure the body’s immunity works well.

Extract

DEAD ZONE of the CITY from a witness who survived

‘To be in the dead zone, a million people are there. The hurdy crowd. The long queue for the bread. The one at the end of one thousand. The foot changes from left to right to alter the pain of the wait. The sunshine casts cold shadows, long across the paved stone. The raised hand shielding the eyes from the bright sunlight. There is dark shadow but a contrast of colours. We with the feet to take us to the spectacle the viewing point, the how could that have happened.  The greys have gone underground. They like the moles dig deep pits, and residency without light. The book shelves, the books piled high. The knowledge acquired the resting of the mind. How long is this wait? The finding out about who the governance truly was. They left us to cope. We cope. The markets full of tinned food and preservation. The soles of shoes, the rubber smooth. The leather worn. The bagged goods.  The air clear. Small lanes, and narrow passes, cobbled stones. English speaking lands, Captain John Smith, sixteen hundreds, the new world, America. The natives. The new landscapes. The troubled land. Bronze statues don’t speak of death. Independence. British realms. Statues, statutes. Legal feat. Fending off  what stands for justice. The long queue. The Great Fire of London. The burned down  homes. The cleared plots. Cheapside, barbers, hairdressers and jewellers. Stone. East of the city, there is not a soul left alive from the fire.  Barking, Southampton Centre not a soul left from the bombings of the world wars.  The burned down houses and shops, the demolished landscape. Air surrounds us.  We are standing but the invisible  grave site is beneath our feet. The buried people, the bones,  beneath the soil. Vacant air. Not a sound from the dead.  They have no tongues now. They have no body, no power. The people died in their houses.  The people died without hope of rescue. The people burned to the ground. The smoke lingered. The blackened city. A million died. Smaller plots, smaller houses. Flats that reach to the sky. The great Tower Bridge.  The hydraulics, the great mechanical  arms. Tidal estuary. Beaches, salt waters meeting fresh.’

Quotation from a longer story copyrighted 2022 Katherine Da Silva

If a person does not have a conscience, what are they? Finding myself under attack as an author was an unexpected thing, in an age of modernity. I know the culprit, cannot be very bright. I was a victim of someone’s prejudice, and it looks like that is still happening. The burglar had erased two lines of this poetic piece, which included the mention of the bronze statue of Captain John Smith which is still in the square off Cheapside. I think the mention was also about Newfoundland, in the Americas, as they were new places to colonize originally. But, this is not the only point… our progressions, are not just about land, but, perhaps it is linked to wealth and power. The world will it seems only embrace the realm of financial stature…. hence the play with words.. but perhaps we are all being fooled into too much of a material expectation.

The Biker

The road had been left sheeny and black like coal and the rain had spat down a load enough to fill the drains and blur a person’s vision.

Wipers swished to-and-fro in the rain. Dr Frank Banbury, approached the junction in his old Volvo saloon car. Outside, the light had dimmed, large clouds full of water in their grey cumulus forms spread across the sky. The tea-time traffic, had built up around the roundabout, which functioned to ferry cars to the centre or outskirts of town.  The science building loomed to his right, as he struggled to see the road signage and decide which route to take. Dr Banbury’s work took him round the world frequently, as a top biochemist and researcher working in the field of medicine, his main interest the hard to cure diseases of the planet. The car lurched forward as vehicles gave way. There was a pregnant pause before entering the stream of cars ahead.

The light glaring like a fog lamp does, somehow the light gets fuzzed and the beam seemed endless, but there was only this one source…. yellow beam from a vintage vehicle…a screech, slide, bang, skid…flop…. can’t move…tried… gasping…wounded, bones stuck in awkward angle, tangled with machine, flipped, spreadeagled, smashed skull, helmet on the island somewhere, long grasses…wrapped in thoughts, anger. Black, dark, sky, black dark, space, blackened water, face down, heart throbbed, throbbed, throbbed.

Sirens, ambulancemen, in vests that glowed.

‘Sir can you hear me? Can you hear me?’

Felt for breath, checked for pulse. There was a faint glimmer of hope as Kevin raised a hand and let out an almighty sound of painful awakeness, ‘Arghaaa’, The owner of the abandoned vehicle grey Volvo, had vanished. The spineboard was fetched, and Kevin’s mutilated body was positioned with neck brace holding his head still. Two fractured leg injuries and blood trickling down from a cut to his forehead. ‘Would you like some gas and air, sir?’

(Flash fiction piece.. less than 356 words)

The Gift

Eidolons are infrequent in our experience as humans, but there are some people, who see them more than others, the world of phantoms and sprites.

‘Can you see the light? Go toward the light!’ Alecia was trying to help her friend. The problem was a loved one, kept appearing in her dreams, and like some strange experience of a ghostly nature things would move and make noises around her house, and Alecia was sure the spirit would go ‘on its way’, with some vocal encouragement. That the soul who had passed would seek heaven the place where immortal souls dwell in peace. She had been entertaining her friend, who came to have her numbers read, when the woman spoke of her dilemma with the visiting ghost, and so Alecia had decided to intervene. Doing readings was proving profitable. The whole business of enticing people into this activity of ‘having a reading done’, was increasingly Alecia’s focus for it made her feel needed, and it gave her purpose in that a person would become fascinated and excited in the same breath at revelations that might mean something about their future path.

It never occurred to her that the pretence might actually attract something real from the spirit world. Her son started seeing ghosts, and at first Alecia half believed it, and even encouraged him to talk about what the ghosts said. Of course, the spirits were people who had passed away, so there was the knowledge that no one could prove anything substantially, and who was to question if what was said might be real?  Between seeing something of a flickering image and perhaps the story gaining him some focus and attention the little son grew to liking his new ‘gifting’.

And the angels and the saints were aware of this… time passed, Alecia grew ill, and her tongue became stilled. And no one knew why or how that happened. Alecia took her knowledge with her to the grave. She neither let up whether the ghosts were real, or that suddenly they had grown silent. Beyond in the heavenly kingdom there was a new arrival.

The Future

I watch as this war of Vladimir Putin the Russian leader, unfolds, and looking at the pure almost anarchy of it, makes me shudder. There the Russian leader disobeying all the international rules for example, especially the treatment of prisoners of war. There cannot be a leader on the planet that could or would see this treatment of prisoners, as acceptable. The incredible displacement of indigenous Ukraine people, who have spent, well at least some of them, half a lifetime in the cities that Russia hopes to ‘conquer’. I cannot possibly in my own mind wonder at why, other than to say it seems insane. But, let us look at the type of comment Putin has been making. He stated he was about the task of ‘denazification’, yet when the Russian soldiers arrived, the locals in Ukraine asked, ‘Where are the Nazis?’ The truth is Ukraine in the last thirty or so years, has been coming out of the fog of an authoritarian regime such as the Communist Party under the Soviet Union had indeed imposed on an entire population. The Soviet Union sought to remove elitism, and strove to promote equality of the sexes. The cooperative element of farming with regard to provision of food for everyone might have been an ideal at the beginning of the revolution back in 1917, but, the problem with isolating the nation from the commercial enterprise of the West, meant they were on their own. I also now think, that the spontaneous competition or strife to survive is more even biologically correct, as competition exists even in nature. If you think of a forest, and the way plants grow, there is competition for the light all around. The straight-jacket of Russian Communism, is never going to fit the free creatures we are as a human race. There has been much talk about a Globalist Agenda, and hence a lot of speculative talking about ‘plandemic’, as if a hidden hand is at work to create a one world government and leader of all the people worldwide. I have to say this would never work, because we are all like ants and many in number, even the best computer would find this a hard task to note every movement of a single creature in ‘the ant’ colony, let alone control the free flow of thought and ideas. I too, look at the sudden pandemic with a sense of trepidation, hoping we ‘come out’ of the shock effect particularly economically. It does seem as if someone wanted to depress the economy, and yes, suddenly the cost of living is exceptionally high. I think the big business people, are going to have to take a cut in pay, for a short period, or their large chain shops are going to be hard to run, especially if in effect, people are forced to go back to ‘grow your own’ for survival.

Coming back to what Vladimir Putin, is actually saying publicly about his ‘special project’ in Ukraine. Firstly he thinks he is freeing people from Nazism. Is he? Suddenly the most undemocratic motion is at work. If people think in their own happy way they are free, who is he to say what is free, and what is not. Ukraine was flourishing with new business enterprise, and happily able to trade globally with whoever they chose. And yes they are farmers, and produce wheat in grand quantities ‘the bread bin’ of the world, and have benefited from the trade abroad. Ukraine is the most wonderful centre of arts, and culture, with musical talent at every corner of the country. There is no doubting this. Yet, a few decades ago, the disaster of the Chernobyl Nuclear Plant, had caused a highly toxic radioactive cloud to not only dispoil, the locality but the effects because of what is blown into the atmosphere are still with us all today. This past history has been hidden away in more recent times, but nonetheless, as Russia advanced on the country, it was as if the explosion at the plant had wholly been forgotton, enough to say the Russians who occupied the plant ignored the advice of the Ukraine operatives, and encamped in the Red Forest grounds. They actually dug up highly radioactive soil, and made trenches. Radiation rates rose in the area. Nearly all the soldiers have been moved to Belarus for treatment of radiation poisoning, and one soldier died. As if this factor alone is not enough. What is Vladimir Putin going to do with all those massive nuclear missiles? He knows his own life is nearly over. I know cancer treatments can leave people feeling darkly depressive and aggressive in their own behaviour. I keep wondering, why are we so patient with Vladimir Putin? He originally grew up on the streets of a big city, moreorless a pauper, and into street fighting. I cannot understand how we in the West and for that matter any of the other countries in the global community, cannot see the danger in the continuation of this leader’s influence.

The words like parody, come to mind, when we listen to Putin’s statements about ‘freeing people’, it is as if he has watched how the USA approached the second invasion of Iraq, justifying it by saying it was freeing its people from a dictator, Saddam Hussein. All the baddass behaviour of the United States military effort is under scrutiny it seems. I think the same thing also can be said about the Syrian conflict, and now where is Putin gathering military paid support from? Syrian mercenaries and also Chechen mercenairies have already been seen in operation in Ukraine. Ramzan Akhmadovich Kadyrov is a Russian in origins and current leader of the Chechen Republic, and someone whose army is accused of stealing expensive farming equipment from the Ukraine which incidently is trackable because of its cost in terms of purchase. Assad has loaned his own soldiers to Vladimir Putin’s ‘special exercise’, this includes an army potentially of over 40,000 troops. (Suddenly images of the predictions of Nostradamus appear in mind of Muslim wars in the European countries). Perhaps, this needs to be addressed. The West cannot leave Ukraine to fight Chechens and Syrian armies. I have a very bad feeling, that perhaps, these additional armies, might constitute, a new larger war effort. Boris Johnson, has been trying to take the middle ground and offer the Ukraine leader equipment only and munitions, and technical support of how to use the new equipments. But, it is like suddenly this monster giant Russia has awoken from it slumber. It must be like Jack and the Beanstalk if you are a Ukrainie person or should I extend that expression too to the rest of the Western nations? I use to read these fairy stories, with wonder. Archeaologists have uncovered human remains showing much larger people several feet higher possibly the height of some buildings, buried under rocks and earth. Perhaps many armies and mercenaries make a giant. The giant seems to be awake. What did Jack do?

Putin’s War Against Ukraine

Infamy comes to mind. Having lived most of my own life in a European country (well until recently), in a status of peacetime, it is the hardest thing to date, to watch what is going on in the country of Ukraine currently. Apart from the fact that, my own mother over many years related the terror of wartime bombings and hardships such as rationing to me not infrequently, as her own childhood was interupted by the second world war, from the age of fourteen. The 1939-1945 war, with Germany, caused a huge disruption to normal life, and yet, people did what they could to carry on inspite of air-raids, and the not infrequent siren warnings. The fact that a rather conventional land attack occured initially in Ukraine, old heavy style land vehicles and tanks, remeniscent of war-time movies, that even Hollywood cannot ignore for too long before yet another account of someone’s life-experience is spilled out onto the silver screen, leaves much to wonder about the state of the nation of Russia in general. When Boris Johnson’s diary of events was announced as in he had attended a COBRA meeting about a build up of military force at the borders of Ukraine, most of our nation was held momentarily in disbelief. After all the hoo hah, of Partygate. It took a further week for me, to realise that the news item about the COBRA meeting was real. Infact the invasion, the actual day of invasion fell on my own brother’s funeral day, the day he was due to be cremated at a ceremony in Totton, near Southampton. I had the radio on, that day first thing, and the words of military movement of tanks into Ukraine, the start of a war, trickled out, leaving me quite horrified, as I travelled from the Isle of Wight via the Red Jet, knowing that this event was not going to be over too soon, if war indeed had started in a European country. And what did that mean for us in Britain? I was half expecting some further announcement, that Britain would be taking part, but, that never came.

Churchill had made that announcement solemly ‘Britain is at war with Germany’ on the event of the invasion of Poland. I look around at our current political leaders, and the cabinet, but our era is so different from the era of the thirties and forties Britain. Has our love of life, the uncontrollable move toward hedonism in the culture, just completely ruined us, or our sense of duty? But, of course perhaps science has changed the nature of war, with the possibility of a nuclear war, being triggered, but, this mostly is seen as unlikely. The worst thing so far, is the realisation that the current Russian leader who was deemed a Christian in belief, could have done this thing of starting a war with its neighbour Ukraine. Perhaps this time, it is closer to home too. The Georgians were on receipt of this aggression some time ago, and live with a status of semi-occupation of sorts. And yet look at the population of Georgia turning out in demonstration against Russia in the public squares on behalf of Ukraine.

My own personal anger, has been rising with every news report of destroyed buildings in beautiful cities, that held enchantment and history, arts and culture, and how could he this leader of Russia, act like a tyrant knocking down whole townships, as if they were Lego; ordering soldiers to shoot civilians including children; kidnapping mayors as the troops moved from township to township. The success of the Ukraine army backed by volunteers from surrounding nations, and abroad has been truly outstanding, a testament to resilience, and pride in their own sense of self-rule. Volodymyr Zelenskyy, the current president of Ukraine has been thrown into action, to defend his nation, and what a man of the people he is! Wearing army fatigues, and consciously encouraging his people to fight back spontaneously jumping into the role. His background was theatrical and he was something of a standup comic by previous profession, but, he has held his own even whilst being ignored over his request for protection of the skies over his own country which has to be agreed with other nations. But, without this no fly zone, of course Ukraine is vulnerable to air attack daily and nightly. My heart feels wrenched from the centre of my person, I cannot ignore a plea for help, especially when it is to do with saving lives. Russia is now probably feeling the effect of the sanctions and withdrawal of business literally from its own high streets, also on the tail end of pandemic mayhem. I cannot cry, about that but, it does feel horrid to think one individual is responsible for all of it. Ukraine has had its own traumas to deal with including the disaster of Chernobyl. Silently, Ukraine has suffered the pollution of the radiation disaster, even today, the population suffers cancers associated with the pollution of this. It is the saddest event to see Ukraine being bullied into submission, though I feel that Zelensky has managed to turn this around promptly. Donbass is Ukraine. Mariupol is Ukraine. I hope that the young people will write about what they went through when it is all over. I remember reading accounts of wartorn Poland, both from the young and the old. And also toward the end of the Soviet era, the union of the people producing the Solidarnosc movement which grew toward Polish independence from the Soviet Union, Russia’s rule.

If anyone harbours the idea that Russian communism is to be supported, they should take time to read about the programming that goes on daily. If a person does not follow the ideology in that country, they are punished or ‘re-educated’ into a form of submission to the rule book. Remember there is always a hand that creates that ‘rulebook’. There is no freedom of information in Russia.

I hope very sincerely Putin resigns. I hope he retires but, that would be being kind. He will probably be tried for war crimes, but this is not the former Yugoslavia is it? I think the leaders of that region, were indeed captured and tried at the Hague. Slobodan Milosevic’s leadership led to human rights abuse in the internal conflict of his country. I think he died in jail in 11th March 2006 of heart failure.

The strife of the refugees, is an ongoing thing currently,but, hopefully it will not be for too long, before people might be able to return to their homeland. The US President Biden, offered billions in money for reparation of the cities that were attacked, but, is that enough? The thing with the ‘torture’ of war, is that it stays in the memory for years afterward. A whole generation of young people will be terribly affected in terms of their education, their lives and freedoms. What a challenge for the global community to make sure justice is seen to be done.

Russian soldiers follow orders, but, too they are humans, and some of the photos or portrait photos of the officers who have died, show a lot about their internal sense of themselves. They are tough on new recruits, and remember the government of Russia relies on the army to do its will. Communism never worked, humans are too susceptible to corruption. Authoritarianism, is unattactive, no one like a dictator. How do we solve this problem? To be continued…..

Christmas is Coming!

The title is more than apt! I look at this time of year with one of anticipated expectation of something of celebration. It is like that occasion when you wander up a hill but, the top seems insurmountable, well until you are there. Then of course the other side, the coming down from the summit is the easier part of the endeavour. It is a great time of year if you have family to go to or invite. I use to cook Christmas dinner and at least my Mother and Step Dad, and sister and brother-in-law, and their kids, came to celebrate. I would cook my best Corden bleu recipes albeit borrowed from some famous chefs, and thoroughly indulge in a spate of cooking roast turkey, and some amazing variants of the roast/boiled potato varieties, and also things like puree’s both of the swede and carrot type, and sometimes the sprouts ended up like a pea green mix with ground hazelnuts and sour cream. Of course if you are cooking for others, it all seems very worth while.. I use to love cooking.

The problem however, is in recent years, I have lost relatives who I consider ‘loved ones’, there is always the inevitable pang of pain, and I wonder why? Why have so many of my loved ones gone so soon? Old age took my parents, but, my sister Alison, died at the age of fifty-five. She caught a disease called motor neurons and went from a happy exercise teacher to someone unable to walk or do much for herself. My art teacher lost her daughter in much the same way but to a thing called Multiple Sclerosis. Both of course are nervous diseases affecting mobility. To me all this was the same trauma level of a car crash. I will never quite understand that both my sisters have left Earth, around the same age. My elder sister Margaret also died but of cancer caused by the sun, in the form of sarcoma. Margaret was a great older sister, and when once I moved back to London from the coast, she sent via my mother, a bottle of Harvey’s Bristol Cream sherry. I loved it. I thought what a magnificent gift. It is odd now, I think of Christmases that ‘worked’, that meant something, that were good to remember. When we were all there together. It is heart wrenching, now to think of who has gone and I do linger after the people who are still there from my childhood.

Mother’s mean so much. My own mother always, always cared about me throughout my adult life. So yes, they are sometimes there in the air, around me. I have to do justice to their trust. I find myself thinking about how they taught me my values. It is for this reason, I also linger on the memory of childhood. It is not every person who can say they were a happy child, but, although by no means were we the wealthiest family, I still had a happy childhood of exploration, and play. It is so important that children are allowed to do that. Do not make adults of children before they are ready to progress. I think I can truly say this I loved my childhood.

Christmas has to mean something for the celebrations to be honourable. It is the birth of Jesus, and also as this is significant, in the establishment of God’s relationship with mankind, it is a time to connect with our Maker through His Son. So be there at His table on Christmas morning! There is something wonderful about grace given to us through prayer. Faith helps me bridge that gap. The one left by loss. I have to believe that my relatives are safe in His care. Loss is so hard to cope with. I would love to tell people what it means to God Himself. There is but love flowing from His mountain. All the emptiness of a material life, cannot be changed unless we grow some understanding of Spirit. Everyone has a soul. And a soul needs nurture. I once let my son wander up to the nativity scene at my home church in Southampton, he was very young only a toddler, but even that memory is a comfort. People all over the world will be feeling loss this Christmas, but, I would love and hope that you seek some wonderful grace from the service at Christmas at your local church. Do not be afraid to go in. ‘Rejoice, rejoice Emmanuel … born in Israel…….’

Here’s an example of that wonderful song for Christmas….

Captain Sir Tom Moore

I watch in dismay that the nation’s Captain Sir Tom Moore, has passed away. This gent who did in the last months of his life raise so much money for the NHS, that he surpassed his goal, by a furlong. It almost seems shameful, that the NHS, should be so beleaguered, at this time of pandemic chaos. But, he perhaps, was the only moment of solace, amongst the wrecking ball, of Covid-19 to everyone’s year of work and holiday time. How crazy, was 2020? How torturous, to an entire population? And now we have vaccines, but, to some it is too much clearly, as the health of elderly patients is at best frail even when they catch the common flu bug. With previous vaccines, like the BCG a allergy test was done before any child had the full vaccine inserted into their blood. Perhaps, this principle might also apply to the vaccines for Covid -19 it might save a life after all.

I was glad when the television provided a moment of admiration for this elderly gent who was paid the respect of his years, and his gallantry, in past wars, and in the fight to overcome the spread of the disease or virus. It seemed, as though a population of elderly were going to be the first victims, in number at least of this new virus, and then some BAME doctors and nurses also fell ill, and some died. It takes seven years to become a doctor, and also a fair amount of time when training as a nurse, so it is so wrong, that the hospital staff, had so little preparation initially for protecting themselves against this very contagious bug.

I guess we are all reeling from the lock down process, I know I hate the restrictions, and it seems if anything a real bore, to have to be so routine. I keep things simple, and enjoy the pastries from Lidl’s wonderful kitchen to keep me happy, and mood good. But, I surely miss sitting in a café, and the occasional meal out. It is all too stressful.

It will also seem doubly tragic, that they will inevitably televise, some of the funeral, of Captain Sir Tom Moore, so we will in turn, mourn his loss, along with his precious family. And all our loved ones who have passed. And how many flowers will it take… before we all heal? Loss is a huge burden on the soul. People who have lived close by anyone dear, will feel a huge numb, sense of empty, and that will be the worse part of 2020, when we all look back.

As I walked to and fro from the supermarket the other day, I found people were almost looking vacantly into the air around them, completely distracted, and unable to feel, part of the community, as everyone is so focused on not being near to strangers.